James and Kevin Comparison Chart™
*denotes
"with an umbrella"
James

Kevin

Fast Food Restaurant Wendy's Burger King
Chocolate Bar Wonder Bar Coffee Crisp
Alcoholic Beverage Cherry whiskey and Seven-up* Gin
Soft Drink Diet Pepsi Coke
Flavour of Potato Chip Pringle's Light Regular Ketchup (seriously)
Flavour of Chip Dip Onion Dill Pickel
Saturday Morning Cartoon Bugs Bunny and the Roadrunner The Tick
Toothpaste Aqua-Fresh for kids Colgate (Not the gel)
Book Fit or Fat by Covert Baily The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis
Pick-Up Line "Please, I'm begging here."* "I know James."
Movie Jaws Big Trouble in Little China and Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Light Bulb 1000 Watt Tungsten* 300 Watt halogen
Celebrity to have sex with Marisa Tomei * Cindy Crawford
Zodiac Sign Libra (Cusp on Virgo) Scorpio
Seventies TV Show All in the Family Sanford and Son
Comedian Jonathan Winters Dennis Miller
Comic Actor Bill Murray Janeane Garofalo
Actor Philip Seymour Hoffman Kevin Spacey
Actress Jodie Foster Emma Thompson
Threw Up Last 1998 Gemini Awards* circa 1991
Size of Mattress Queen* Double
Peanut Butter Texture Smooth Smooth
Jelly/Jam Jelly   (Grape) Jam   (Strawberry)
Underwear Style Briefs Boxers
T-Shirt Crew V-neck
Collar size 17.5 15
Height (feet, inches) 6'0"* 5'10"
Eye Color Blue Brown
Religious Upbringing Anglican None
Size of TV 27" 26"
TV Show The Simpsons Hilarious House of Frightenstein
J and K Episode One Hour Special Roughrider Special
Turn-ons Warm Summer Nights* Barry White Albums, cigars
Turn-offs None Rodney Dangerfield movies
Birth September 23, 1966*
Fort Frances, Ontario, Canada
November 18, 1969
Regina, Saskatchewan, Canada
Education B.F.A. Film and Video B.A. Religious St/Pol. Science
Birth Place Fort Frances, Ontario, Canada Regina, Sask., Canada
Lowest price remembered paying for a chocolate bar $0.10 CDN $0.25 CDN
Recreational Exercise Swimming Pool Volleyball Tennis
Vacation Spot Hawaii* Hawaii
Nicknames "Big Daddy", "Jimmy" "Fluffy", "Larry", "Dice", "Big Daddy K","Charmin"
Number of Siblings 2 1
Dog/Cat Cat Neither (although he has a cat)
Ketchup with Macaroni Yes No Way
Onions on Burgers Yes, bring 'em on! No
Banana Hanger in Kitchen No Yes
Wine White Red
Wine Packaging Box Bottle (screw top)
Ice Cream Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Hagen Dazs Coffee Flavored
Makes bed in morning No Yes
Fruit Banana Yes
Style of  potato Baked Mashed
Desert Chocolate Cheese Cake New York Style Cheese Cake
High School Year Book "John Candy's Understudy?" "Don't Squeeze the Charmin."
Class Clown in School Yes No
Times Arrested by Police 3 0
Number of Lawyer Friends 0 5
Pay Student Load No Yes
Remember the 60's No No
Inhaled Yes Yes
Color Red White
Highest Weight (lbs) 292 185
Magician Penn and Teller Penn and Teller
Former Soviet Block country Poland Uzbekistan
Number 23 23
U.S. President Jimmy Carter Franklin D. Roosevelt
Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau Not Available at this time
Time of Day Midnight 7:30pm
Spice Girl Grumpy Trampy
Hollywood Square Arte Johnson* Paul Lynd
Charlie's Angel Farah Fawcett Jaqueline Smith
Dance Style Macarena* Lambada: "The Forbidden Dance"
Home Alone Movie No. 1 Three-way tie!
SCTV Performers
in order
of preference
John Candy
Martin Short
Rick Moranis
Andrea Martin
Dave Thomas
Catherine O'Hara
Eugene Levy
Joe Flarhetty
John Candy
Martin Short
Eugene Levy
Joe Flaherty
Andrea Martin
Dave Thomas
Catherine O'Hara
Rick Moranis
Saturday Night Live
Top Five
Bill Murray
Chevy Chase
Dan Akroyd
John Belushi
Gilda Radner
John Belushi
Dan Aykroyd
Phil Hartman
John Lovitz
Billy Crystal
Foreplay Spanking* Backrub
New Buzzword * Paparazzi
Pasta Alphaghetti Farfalle
20th Century Invention Spice Girls TV Remote Control
Theologian Martin Luther Deitrich Bonhoeffer
Current Residence Toronto Saskatoon
Worst Job Door to door vacuum salesperson Zeller's Department Store